Worst Smart Car Ever?

Don't get me wrong - I love Smart cars - been close to putting my name on the list a couple of times, just to get to and from work in a more environmentally friendly manner. And I like Batman too (although not all of the movies - can't wait to see Dark Knight though).

But the two of them together? Not the best idea someone's had. More photo's here (all from SEMA in Vegas, which is meant to show the best tuner cars on the planet - they need a stricter door policy if this sneaked through).

Need some help with that walk?

To me, this looks like some form of punishment (although they have added some strategic padding in there), but to others, it might be a life changer.

I guess Honda took the "develop a fuel efficient mode of transport" to the extreme, as this one looks like it's powered by donuts and Chipolte (in my case it would be anyway). They even have a nice instructional video for you, so you can see how it all works.

Jet Powered Diahatsu

Some people do the craziest things in there spare time, and this looks a prime example. Given the light weight, I'm sure this truck will pretty much take off with any power coming from the jet on the back. Might be fun once, but the year in the hospital after that first trip may not be something you're really looking for. Luckily, in the interests of your safety and well-being, I waited until after the E-Bay auction was finished before posting this. You can thank me later.

Brake Your Nuts

Please don't get these (but it made me laugh out loud)

Be a robot for a week?

If you want to try it, you can rent these exoskeleton legs for $2200 per week. 10 times your normal strength apparently, so if you've got an upcoming UFC fight, or a bully at school who you think might jump you, it could be the perfect solution. Me, I might get a set for Mark Viduka - been a while since I've seen him play......

Presidential Pumpkin Patterns

How's that for alliteration?And what could be more pleasant than having a picture of Tina Palin/Sara Fey on your Halloween special? Downloads and printouts and everything, for the artistically incapable (me).

Halloween Eyes

If you're struggling for a costume, maybe these will give you a little inspiration. I'm kinda tempted to forgo the whole costume thing and just wear these with a white t-shirt and a pair of jeans. Low mainenance, but still kinda creepy. Of course, I'll probably end up as Tigger or the Beer Keg again....

Doggles?

Hmm, not exactly sure what you'd use these for, unless you're putting the dog on the back of the Harley with you....

Shoes and Phones - the perfect wife gift

And it's only 22 bucks...

Get in someone's head

Not sure who's exactly, and definitely not sure about the sheepskin type interior going on, but for the people out there that need their very own hiding place inside their home, this could be the answer. The link for this is here, but you'll need to click around to find it as they have masking on all the sub pages of the site. And while you're there, you can check out some of the other slightly weird stuff (like Man with Prick sculpture - "The penis of this sculpted a man is completely out of proportion to the rest of his body. While proud of his huge member, the man is unable to move because of its staggering weight." Apparently)

I'm pretty sure none of this stuff is sold at Ikea.

2009 Audi A7

I realize I've been slacking a little lately, so I'm going to make an effort to get out at least one post per day (on weekdays, just in case).

First one in my new routine is an alleged spy shot of the Audi A7. Apart from the fact that it could realistically be anything under there, this has to be the best camo shot I've seen. The old cover the thing in a weird black rubber/plastic at key parts (similar to the Colorado obsession with those hideous black 'bra' things they cover the front of the car with to prevent stone chips on their paintwork) is obviously old school now. Not sure how the sack is going to survive under high speed (meaning over 20mph from the look of this thing) testing, but that's not really our problem, is it.

Source: The German site Bilder

Spy Sunglasses

If using sunglasses to check out the girls on the beach isn't quite enough, and you need to replay your view afterwards, this is the solution for you (but maybe you really need some psych counselling, or just your own girlfriend?).

$400 and a 15 metre range back to the receiver, which has 2GB of storage, along with playback, and it looks like you can hook up multiple cameras to it. Hours of fun for someone, I'm sure.

Fancy Guns

If you happen to live in a third world country (if they even exist now - I'll tell you when I finish reading this book), or maybe you come from the rich end of Detroit, these might interest you. Me, I think I'll stick to buying the wife the occasional handbag (sorry, purse for you Americans) - it's much safer that way, especially when I forget to fill the dishwasher.

Horsepower Takes on Original Meaning

So someone in Dubai took the horsepower thing a little too literally (or maybe they just dreamed of the good old days) and came up with this little invention. It actually does have a host of electronics in there, but they're all powered by the horse on the treadmill inside. It even has a battery that gets charged by the horse when he's feeling energetic, to make up for the times when he turns into a total lazy slob.

Although that's all well and good (although I'm a little worried that the whole going to the bathroom while on a treadmill may create a few issues...), what the world really needs is more of these hamster powered cars.....

Crazy Scooter Mod

I think I want one.

Stop

Some humor to try and induce people to actually obey the stop signs. If it's anything like the one behind our back yard, the only thing that will work is a cop parked off to the side (and that only counts for cars - apparently if you're on a bike you don't have to stop even then).

The other signs are here.

Matte Black F430

If you got a 200k supercar, would you paint it matte black?

Apparently this isn't even paint - it's an all over vinyl coat - does the paint survive under that thwn you realize you really just wanted your red baby back?

Chips in a Cup (holder)

If you really can't wait until you get home to eat you McD's fries, this could be perfect for you. For the majority of people however, it's the most useless gadget in the world.

Skiing on a Segway?

Well something has to be done to make it cool....

Tech Tattoos

I think I want one

Shocking Big Wheels

Hmm.. I saw both of these today, and I just can't work out which one I hate more. The fact that people obviously spent a decent amount of time on putting these together could well be more worrying than the end result.

Ready for Summer?

Just to get everyone in the mood 8-) Pic came from here

Worst Car "Body" Kit Ever

It's not big, and it's not clever

Hold The Hookah; It Might Have Herpes

Nope, not more Spitzer jokes - Hookah Bars up around CSU appear to be the culprit in a spread of cold sores in the Fort Collins area. Just say no, it's the only way to go (or carry your own pipe around with you if you like...)

Hold The Hookah; It Might Have Herpes - Denver News Story - KMGH Denver

Inflatable Buildings

Now here's a great idea from a UK company - just make sure that you don't lay it over any sharp objects...

Details via DVICE are here

Blood Powered Tattoo/Phone Thing?

Cool but very scary concept. I'm guessing JB is already in the queue to get one, so he can realize his dream of the perfect gadget.

Wine Rack

The less I say about this the better, but it did make it onto Richard and Judy's show, so it has to be lijit.

Portable Microwave Cube?

From the inventors of things you never knew you really needed comes the Cube Microwave. If you need your Hot Pockets where ever you travel, this thing is for you (but you still need to plug it in...

Justin's Truck?

I doubt it, but this is definitely more than a dick in a box.

God Save the Queen

Or something like that - in possibly the most shocking news in a long time, The Queen now has her own YouTube channel. Old Christmas speeches and random clips from the archives abound - I haven't found the shot of her launching crying about Britney or launching Pepsi bottles with a couple of Mentos in there yet, but I'm sure they're there if you keep digging.

Just coz I'm feeling kinda nostalgic and patriotic, here's the link to the 1957 broadcast - the first ever TV broadcasted one (for the non-UK readers, we get a 10 minute address from the Queen every year on Christmas Day - it used to be compulsory watching when I was younger, but mainly coz it was followed by the latest James Bond film on BBC ;-)

What I want to know now is why The Queen has disabled embedding of the videos? Are they that desperate for the ad share revenue from Google? I thought she was loaded as it is?

Santa Kidnapped?

The Dark Side of the Force making a claim over Christmas?

New Doors?

And I always thought the Lambo door mod was cool.

Porsche 928 - The Nightmare Version

When I was growing up, the 928 was high on my wish list of cars. It stayed on there for a very long time, in part coz despite it being so old by the time it finally ceased production it still looked pretty modern, and in part due to it being available for purchase second hand at a price I could almost grasp affording (think 5000 pounds or so). Now, of course, I would never have been able to afford the insurance, or the petrol (gas), and if anything ever went wrong, it would completely bankrupt me for the rest of my life. So, I didn't buy one, although one of the guys who used to go surfing did get one and ran it successfully for about 18 months before the expensive repairs kicked in.

Anyway, this is all leading up to this following video, in which someone has completely massacred one of my childhood dreams. I've asked myself why a few times, and apart from the obvious "I need a fast truck" I'm at a loss for words - I thought that's why they had the high performance Dodge and Ford trucks (if you ever see someone trying to drive one of these 500 hp things in the snow in Denver, give them a wide berth - it's funny to watch, but not when you're in the lane next to them). And Porsche apparently helped him get approval to take it on the road...

Supersoaker Sad Boy

When you own every single supersoaker ever made, there's no other way to describe except sad. Sorry, I know it probably took up a large portion of your life (and cash), but really? Why bother?

Continuing the slightly bad taste theme for today

The gas grabber - who thinks of this stuff?

One Day...

I hope the be rich, but I promise I will never be rich enough to forget that my Maserati has been towed, and I need to pay the fines.

Apparently this guy was "too busy" setting up his new company to remember that his car was towed, and he needed to pay the fines before they auctioned it off.

Luckily, he now has a PA once again to take care of the "domestic" stuff, and anyway, he never spends much time in London in the summer.

Give me strength.....

If only I'd known

This might have been prefect for Tonk's Bachelor/Stag/Bucks party

If pixelated body parts will offend you or get you fired, you're not allowed to click the link - you have been warned.

Scariest Use of Inkjet Printer Technology

I started listening to this thinking it was some sort of joke, but apparently they're deadly serious. It gave me the distinct impression that I was in the middle of some weird Sci-Fi movie flashback - maybe RoboCop or Starship Troopers?

Real Flying Car

This thing is amazing. I want one, now. And it's in production apparently!!!

Grope on a Rope????

Continuing the dodgy posts this morning comes "Grope on a Rope" - I kid you not. Who thinks of these names?

It's actually a bar of soap (on a rope), for the people who don't get enough physical contact. Another bargain at 7.50 (pounds this time - not sure if you can get it over here).

This is just wrong

On so many different levels. I just don't want to talk about it. At least there's no visible tails.

May the Force be with You

For the bargain price of only 20 bucks, you too can declare your move to the Dark Side (while looking like an arse.....)

Update: this one looks so much better (even though the wearer seems scared out of his/her wits)

Apple Ring

Too geeky for me, and that's saying something, but I'm sure this apple ring will appeal to someone, especially as it's only 4 bucks...

Coffin Craziness

More for Mr Bland than anyone else (especially after the month long bender, combined with exercise and a very healthy Chipolte diet), here's the Crazy Coffins site - if you don't fancy spending the rest of your (dead) life stuck in a boring old wooden box, spice up the life of those worms and creep crawlies by giving them something interesting to eat through.